Does true love exist? For the past 35 years, Keven Clark has given his wife a single red rose every week. It is a tradition he started before he and his wife were married. Kevin came upon this tradition when he was a young insurance agent. He was delivering a life insurance check to an elderly widow when a package arrived. The women started to cry as she opened the box and found a single rose. Her husband had faithfully bought her a rose every week during their 60 years of marriage. Before her husband died, he had made arrangements with the local florist to continue the weekly deliveries for the rest of her life.
This moved Kevin so deeply, that a few years later when he met his wife, he adopted the tradition. Aisha Sultan shares this story and many others in this past weekends issue of the St. Louis Post Dispatch. I can hear someone saying, “This is too extreme” or “This is too expensive” or “Why would you have to do this, it seems like my spouse ought to just know that I love” or “I don’t have to give my spouse anything to show my love”. I hear all of these things on a weekly basis in my coaching business. Unfortunately, I hear these things from people whose marriages are broken. This beautiful story from the Post has two incredible lessons for all of us who want phenomenal marriages.
The first lesson is that great marriages are marked by thoughtfulness and giving. I don’t know Keven Clark’s wife or the elderly widow mentioned in the article, but I can imagine that they both felt and feel incredibly loved by their spouses. I can imagine their friends saying, “Your husband does what every week?” I can imagine their faces lighting up and their hearts being warmed every time they receive that rose. I was on the receiving end of this kind of love my entire marriage, and I can honestly tell you there was not a day that I did not feel incredibly loved. As we roll into 2018, what love tradition can you start with your spouse? Maybe you are not in a position to buy a rose a week but certainly you could write a handwritten note on a weekly basis. Make a commitment to get into the habit of giving on a weekly basis.
The second lesson deals with the power of modeling. Mr. Clark was impacted by the actions of this widow’s husband. The truth is people are watching how you treat your spouse. If you have children, they are watching. Your friends are watching. What kind of legacy of love are you leaving for people who are observing your marriage? Make a commitment that in 2018 you are going to model for your children, friends and family what true love looks like. You will be glad that you did, your spouse will be blessed and you will have a phenomenal marriage.