In addition to my marriage coaching practice, I also work in the area of hospice and grief. I have the honor of facilitating over 20 grief groups a year. During these groups, I am frequently confronted with spouses who lost their partners suddenly. One of the common themes in the face of sudden loss, is the regret and guilt of things that were left unsaid. In today’s post I want to share five things that you can share with your spouse every day. These are five things that will help you have a regret free marriage and an incredible connection. Change up the words, make it your own, but communicate them daily.
- I am so glad that you are my husband/wife. Even when things are not perfect you can find some reason to affirm your decision to marry. Let your partner know on a regular basis that you are glad that you chose them and they chose you. When you share this, you will touch their heart, and your own heart will grow.
- I appreciate you. Let your spouse know daily how much you appreciate what they do for you and what they do for the family. You might be surprised to learn when you begin to verbally express appreciation, how much more you find to appreciate in your spouse.
- I want to be close to you. Express to your spouse your desire to have a close relationship and a deep connection. Sometime we can get so distracted by children, careers and other challenges that we give our spouses the impression that these issues are more important than our connection. Let your partner know on a daily basis that you want to be close to them.
- I am excited about our future. Find things that you can get excited about in the future and begin to anticipate them with your spouse. Maybe it is an upcoming family milestone like birthdays, graduations or anniversary. Maybe it is as simple as this Friday’s date night. Let your spouse know on a daily basis that you are excited about your future.
- I love you. Tell your spouse on a daily basis that you love them and demonstrate it with your actions.
Communicating these five relational realities on a daily basis will strengthen your relationship, deepen your connection and help you have a regret free marriage. Even if you have not communicated any of these in past, start today.